The name is absent



periods of illness, diary keepers expressed concerns regarding the care that their
children were receiving, and their inability to provide adequately for them whilst they
were ill. Patricia and Gertrude’s diaries showed clearly their concern over the current
and future security and well-being of their children.

My thoughts today are that when I’m sick my children worry me because care is
lacking and they are not eating and wearing [clothes] the way I want them to be as
a mother.....they feel lonely because they miss me as I’m the only one they trust in

their lives. I didn’t see any help because my carer is still not around. (Patricia,
diary extract, March 9th 2004)

Now I think when I will die where will my children remain and what are they
going to eat and who will pay for them in school, so they will drop out from school
when I will die. This is the most serious thing I think about when I’m very sick.
(Gertrude, diary extract undated)

Optimism and sense of purpose

While many of the emotions expressed through the diaries were understandably
negative, the illness experience was a dynamic process, with significant periods of
enhanced well-being recorded during periods of illness remission. While this was due
in part to people’s optimism that they were recovering from the illness, their ability to
be independent and fulfill familial and livelihood roles was of paramount importance
in enhancing their sense of value and purpose. Miriam for example, recorded her
happiness at being able to continue her livelihood activities, while the photographs

13



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